Las Vegas Hotels to Institute Toiletry Experience Augmentation Tax

Las Vegas resorts have decided to double down on fees likely to rile up Las Vegas visitors. Hotels will soon charge an additional fee for bathroom amenities, specifically, toilet paper.

“While we understand there could be a small amount of backlash related to the implementation of this fee,” said one resort spokesperson, “our guests will soon realize how much they enjoy an enhanced bathroom experience at our Las Vegas resorts.”

Industry reps are quick to point out the Toiletry Experience Augmentation Tax will allow the hotels to invest in improved toilet tissue comfort for guests, especially in the area of “additional plies, reflecting the status of Las Vegas hotel bathrooms as truly world-class.”

Hotel courtesy fold

It’s unclear whether there will be a separate charge for the “courtesy fold.”

The new fee will be tiered, depending upon how much toilet paper one needs, and lower-cost, individual sheet options will be made available, presumably thanks to customer feedback acquired from focus group research.

It’s expected locals, members of the military and those with irritable bowel syndrome will be given a free, 90-day grace period after the program starts. According to hotel representatives, after that, they’re “S.O.L.”

The “TP tariff,” as it’s being called, is in line with an overall trend of companies charging for previously free services and amenities.

An example would be the fees associated with air travel. It’s common now for airlines to charge for snacks, carry-on baggage, WiFi and the privilege of not having to sit next to a really fat guy.

Free hand soap

Other Las Vegas hotel charges being considered are a hand soap fee, shower cap fee, mouthwash fee and what’s described as “a fee for merely casting your gaze toward the minibar.”

In Las Vegas, annoying surcharges abound. There are the much-lamented resort fees, concession fees, early and late check-in fees, parking fees and hefty fees for forgetting to leave your prostitute in an upright and locked position.

The jury’s still out about the Toiletry Experience Augmentation Tax. Some Vegas visitors will no doubt pay the fee without complaint. Others are unlikely to take a toilet paper tax sitting down.

We’d love to hear what you think.

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  • Karl Pender

    Shame the CNF charge wasn’t an April Fools joke also

  • Cliff Utting

    But should you really be giving the hotels more ideas?

  • Photoncounter

    Marriott gives you extra rewards points at certain hotels, Residence Inn is one, if you opt out of a daily cleaning and reuse the towels, make your own bed, etc. it’s about the same as spending another $3 if you are a Platinum member (photon counter is a platinum premier). This is to reduce their labor costs under the phony “save the planet, be green” theme.

    Weak attempt here at an AF article. You probably needed an extra old fashioned before writing it!

  • Todd Sterling

    Someone needs to wake me up, I get it now. LOL!

  • Perfect!

  • Wally Marshall

    The general public needs to stop soliciting these properties that are trying to make millions through stupid fees.

  • Jelani Sample

    Funny story! But I wish you wouldn’t give the geniuses that run the big casinos any ideas! They might really start charging for toilet paper! They will refer to it as the Supplemental Hotel Incidental Tax.

  • Misslaydj

    Wow good thing i was not the first to comment i would not have thought it was an april fools joke