Monthly Archives: August 2013

The Linq Will Be Home to World’s First Pizza Hat

The Linq pedestrian promenade, currently under construction between the Flamingo and The Quad, will bring an array of new dining and entertainment options to the Las Vegas Strip.

If you don't see what we see, you're not looking closely enough!

If you don’t see what we see, you’re not looking closely enough!

While some tenants of The Linq have been officially announced, there appear to be more big surprises in store, and we’ve unearthed one of those surprises in a worldwide exclusive.

Close examination of the unaltered renderings for The Linq reveal a yet-to-be announced tenant, Pizza Hat.

Pizza Hat could be the perfect melding of cheese and couture.

Pizza Hat could be the perfect melding of cheese and couture.

Details about the first-of-its-kind Pizza Hat outlet are few, but queries with Linq and Caesars Entertainment officials lead us to believe this new retail and dining concept will combine fashion and food.

One insider, who requested not to be identified, confided, “We can’t discuss this publicly yet, but pizza is one of the most popular foods in history, so can you imagine anything that’s more of a game-changer than a store which sells pizza hats?”

Further sleuthing has turned up what appears to be a prototype for the offerings at this new shop at The Linq.

Imagine hats that can prevent melanoma and satisfy your muchies.

Imagine hats that can prevent melanoma and satisfy your munchies.

While a novel idea, we’re wondering about the legal ramifications of putting a hot pizza on one’s head.

We expect more details about the world’s first Pizza Hat store will be released soon, so check back often for updates.

Las Vegas Will Get Its Own Top-Level Domain Thingy

Sometime in 2014, Las Vegas will be one of the first cities in the country with its own top-level Internet domain, .vegas.

This fancy new domain will be another option in addition .com or .org, and like most specialized top-level domains, will be used by just about nobody. (Remember when .museum really took off?)

We needed a Vegas-themed photo here that we can also share on Pinterest. Done and done.

We needed a generic, Vegas-themed photo here that we could also share on Pinterest. Done and done.

As with so many things in Las Vegas, the city will get a cut of the action, receiving revenue based upon the number of domains registed using the new .vegas extension.

Only three other cities get to have their own top-level domains: Miami, Boston and New York City.

Announcements about the new .vegas top-level domain have been filled with the usual WTF: “The new top-level domain will give the city an edge in marketing, as Las Vegas will rise to the top of Internet searches.” Which is an interesting perspective, given the person who wrote that appears to have never actually used one of these new-fangled “search engines.”

Oh, it gets better: “It also furthers the city’s goal to be on the cutting edge of technology and innovation, helping make Las Vegas a world-class city.” Yes, because a vanity domain name is what makes cities world-class. Not, you know, a metric ass-ton of hotel rooms, gambling, restaurants, shows, all that.

And don’t even get us started about how having a top-level domain puts one on the cutting edge of technology. We’re getting callouses from all the face-palming.

Oh, well, it’s still kind of cool. It’s about Vegas, after all.

We can’t wait to get our VitalVegas.vegas domain name, because it’ll sort of make us sound like we’ve suffered a head injury.

Third Street at Downtown Grand Closes Temporarily

The street at Downtown Grand, the one that runs in front of Mob Bar, Triple George and Hogs & Heifers (Third Street, between Stewart and Ogden), has closed temporarily to make way for some new Vegas awesomeness.

Here’s a peek into the construction area.

What we expect will soon become one of our new favorite places in Vegas.

What we expect will soon become one of our new favorite places in Vegas.

The street closure means there’s no valet parking outside some of our favorite downtown spots, but there’s a convenient parking garage just a few feet away.

There’s a lot of newness in the works, including a massive renovation of the former Lady Lucky hotel, and a slew of new restaurants and outdoor gambling.

The street closure will in no way interrupt the flow of Triple George chicken parm into our face.

The street closure will in no way interrupt the flow of Triple George chicken parm into our face. It’s easily our favorite in Las Vegas.

Third Street is expected to open again in a couple of weeks.

Check out the Downtown Third blog for updates. We sort of have a thing for blogs.

11 Alternate Uses for Your Casino Players Club Card

If you’re like us, you have a serious surplus of casino loyalty club cards.

Over time, dupes and expired players club cards seem to magically accumulate, but rather than discarding them (literally), consider one of our 11 alternate uses for these otherwise pesky cards. You might end up saving time, money or valuable landfill space. (Not really, but it sounds good, doesn’t it?)

Players club cards are multiplying faster than hotel resort fees.

Yes, some of these ideas ruin your cards. Don’t worry, the casinos will make more.

1. iPhone Stand

Here’s a trick that’s convenient and a money-saver. Just make a couple of bends in your card, and you’ve got a handy iPhone stand, perfect for multimedia viewing on the fly.

If you think these ideas are going to get better, you are sadly mistaken.

If you think these ideas are going to get better as we go along, you are sadly mistaken.

Why waste money on cell phone accessories when you can waste it on lap dances and gambling instead? The players club card smartphone stand is adjustable, too. Just change the angle of the bends. This isn’t rocket science.

This configuration can also serve as a business card holder.

Bonus alternate use: Gambling-themed business card holder, anyone?

2. Paint Masking Tool

Painter’s tape and edge-painting tools can be a pain, so try this “Why didn’t I think of that?” technique.

DIY painting precision, baby. We can call you baby, right?

DIY painting precision, baby. We can call you “baby,” right?

3. Crumber

You’ve no doubt seen them in high-end restaurants, as servers and bus boys use their “crumbers” (also called “groomers”) to clean tables between courses. A players club card can accomplish the same task, but without all the pretense.

Now, feel like you're at a fancy Wynn restaurant even though you're eating Hot Pockets at home.

Now, you can feel like you’re at a fancy Wynn restaurant even though you’re eating crackers, at home.

4. Guitar Pick

If you’re a plucker, no problem, but if you’re a strummer, you’re probably going to need a pick. This handmade pick is great in a pinch, and you can cut out about six from a typical players club card.

We have clearly never used an actual guitar pick, but you get the idea.

We have clearly never used an actual guitar pick, but you get the idea.

5. Ninja Throwing Star

You just never know when your enemies might try a sneak attack. With a little practice, and a flick of the wrist, a thrown players card can wreak some serious havoc.

Well, at least that's not mildly disturbing.

Well, at least that’s not mildly disturbing.

6. Optical Illusion

Players club cards are so versatile, they can even serve as conversation starters. Here’s a cool effect that seems to defy the laws of the natural world. You know, like Criss Angel. (And we don’t mean that in a good way.)

How blown is your mind right now?

How blown is your mind right now? (Would it kill you to just play along?)

Of course, you’ll want step-by-step instructions so you, too, can impress friends and loved ones. As long as your friends and loved ones are easily impressed, of course.

7. Door Key

Credit cards have been used to “jimmy” locks for years, and players club cards can serve the same function. Assuming you’re trying to unlock a door from the 1960s.

Why do they call it "jimmying" a lock? You'd think they'd have caught him by now.

Who is this “jimmy” person, and why haven’t they caught him by now?

8. Bike Spoke Flapper

Try some good, clean fun by affixing a card to your child’s bike with duct tape. As the spokes hit the card, the bike will sound like a motorcycle. A really lame motorcycle, but that’s beside the point.

Yeah, like kids still ride bikes.

Yeah, like kids still ride bikes.

9. Cake Cutter

Twinkies are back, and you know you’ll be forced to share, so use your card as a close-at-hand cutter. It works well for regular cakes, too, but we were trying to be topical.

Wash the card first! Oh, and there's an 81% chance it'll still be useable at the casino. If you ever find frosting on your slot machine, now you'll know why.

Wash the card first! Oh, and there’s an 81% chance it’ll still be useable at the casino. Related: If you ever discover frosting on a slot machine, now you’ll know why.

10. Picture Frame

There’s no better way to showcase your Las Vegas memories than a picture frame fashioned from a players card. Just use an X-Acto knife to cut out the middle of your card, but be careful. If you lose a finger, suddenly we’re the jerks.

We're actually going to keep this. How did that happen?

We’re actually going to use this. How on Earth did that happen?

If you’re really crafty, you’ll want to use the cut-out part of the card as a frame stand (see below).

This would be a great time to consider what is commonly known as "getting a life."

We’re fully aware we need to get a life, thanks.

11. Cord Organizer

It’s about time you got the chaos around you under control. Those tangled cords are messing with your feng shui, but tranquility can be yours with a few simple alterations to your loyalty club card.

You know it's just a matter of time: "Free cord organizers for new club members!"

You know it’s just a matter of time: “Free cord organizers for new club members!”

Sure, there are many more clever uses for players club cards, but the number “11” has a nice ring to it. Use your cards to smooth out the bubbles in bumper stickers, to scrape the crud from the walls of an aquarium or the ice from your car windows (probably not in Las Vegas), or even as a caulking aid.

If you have other ideas, we’d love to hear them. If you think ours are stupid, please keep it to yourself.

In Vegas, It’s Good to Know a Guy: Fizz at Caesars Palace

There’s a champagne bar and lounge coming to Caesars Palace in the fall of 2013, called Fizz.

This new bar will be more than just a bar, though, mainly because the official news release says it will be the “epicenter of chic,” and if a news release says it, it must be true.

The new Fizz will cost $3.2 million and display artwork from Elton John's personal collection.

The new Fizz will cost $3.2 million and display artwork from Elton John’s personal collection. Bonus points if you can find Big Bird.

Fizz is being created in partnership with Elton John’s partner, David Furnish. And by partner, of course, we mean “partner.” (They were married in 2005.) In Las Vegas, it’s good to know a guy.

The new champagne bar will be 2,750-square-feet, and will be found in Caesars Palace’s casino, near the entrance to The Forum Shops.

We're no interior designer, but we figure this wall will come down once Fizz is open.

We’re no interior designer, but we figure this wall will come down once Fizz is open.

Beyond the bubbly, Fizz will also serve up “caviar, charcuterie and small plates,” probably because small plates are much easier to wash.

Fizz will have “high-end details focused on patterns and texture, resulting in a glam-chic look rich in golds and muted tones with metal accents.” Translation: “We needed more random combinations of words for this news release.”

Aside from the fact the PR gobbledygook generator is turned up to 11 here, we’re always up for a new bar on The Strip, especially one from somebody so well-connected. How cool would it be to hang out in a bar where Sir Elton John and his partner are knocking a few back?

It’s always been a perk to know a guy (or diva) in Las Vegas. Claire Sinclair knew Holly Madison, now she’s headlining in “Pinup” at The Stratosphere. Another Madison gal pal, Angel Porrino, has a featured spot in “Absinthe.” Singing impressionist Véronic DiCaire parlayed a Celine Dion connection into headlining gig at Bally’s.

Of course, you have the best Las Vegas connection possible. You know a Las Vegas blog, intimately. Or will, once you spoil us with some charcuterie.

The High Roller Ferris Wheel By the Numbers

We’re keeping a close eye on the progress of the High Roller Ferris wheel, now towering over The Strip. The wheel’s outer rim is in the home stretch.

Motto: "Suck it, London Eye!"

The High Roller wheel (motto: “Suck it, London Eye!”) will be 550 feet tall, making it the world’s tallest observation wheel.

We thought it might be a good time to recap some of the numbers involved with this master class in engineering.

The High Roller will weigh about 5,000 tons. It will be 520 feet in diameter.

Sin City's latest brush with awesome.

Sin City’s latest brush with awesome.

The walls of the wheel’s rims are two inches thick.

Each rim section is 56 feet long and weighs about 90,000 pounds.

We got all up in the High Roller's grill.

We got all up in the High Roller’s grill.

The blue braces on the wheel which hold the rim in place are called “radial struts,” and will support the 28 rim sections until they’re removed. The wheel will be held together by cables. The cables will serve as tensioned spokes, keeping the rim in compression, whatever that might mean.

The blue braces will find a good home after they've outlived their usefulness.

The blue braces will find a good home after they’ve outlived their usefulness.

The wheel will have 112 cables, each 225 feet long.

Each of the cables has a breaking force of 550 tons.

The High Roller wheel almost makes us want to learn math. Almost.

The High Roller wheel almost makes us want to learn math. Almost.

When the wheel is complete, it will move at a rate of one foot per second. A full rotation of the wheel will take about 30 minutes.

The wheel will be driven by eight hydraulic drive motors at its base.

The wheel will be driven by eight hydraulic drive motors at its base.

The High Roller’s hub section weighs 546 tons, alone.

The bearings used in the hub section are two feet thick and weigh 19,400 pounds.

The hub. Which is what they should have called The Quad, frankly.

The hub. Which is what they should have called The Quad, frankly.

The High Roller’s brace leg, which is perpendicular to the wheel, is 330 feet long.

The main legs are 275 feet tall.

Worldwide exclusive: The High Roller Port-a-Potty.

Worldwide exclusive: The High Roller Porta Potty, about 225 feet up.

There will be 28 cabins, or “capsules,” for passengers. Each cabin will weigh nearly 44,000 pounds.

Each cabin will hold up to 40 riders, so the High Roller will have a capacity of 1,120 riders at any one time.

The wheel is designed to last 50 years, or 657,000 rotations.

Yes, the High Roller is happy to see you.

Yes, the High Roller is happy to see you.

The High Roller will be the centerpiece of The Linq, a new shopping, dining and entertainment promenade from Caesars Entertainment, owners of several resorts in Las Vegas (including Paris, Flamingo, The Quad, Caesars Palace, Planet Hollywood and others). The Linq is located between the Flamingo and The Quad, and will have more than 300,000 square feet of space, hopefully with as few porn-slappers and timeshare salespersons as possible.

A number of tenants have been announced for The Linq, including Brooklyn Bowl (a bowling and concert venue), Sprinkles Cupcakes, Chayo Mexicano, F.A.M.E. (an Asian night market) and Off the Strip Bistro restaurant, as well as popular chains Yardhouse and Tilted Kilt.

As for the other Las Vegas observation wheel, allegedly under construction at the south end of The Strip, SkyVue has been eerily quiet since its last announcement.

More updates to come! The High Roller Ferris wheel is expected to open in early 2014.