Before You Hate on Chick-fil-A Coming to Las Vegas, Stop and Read This

The best place on Earth (SPOILER ALERT: Las Vegas) is about to get even better. Chick-fil-A has announced it will open up to 10 restaurants in Nevada over the next five years.

To those who have partaken in The Greatest Chicken Sandwich in the Known Universe, this news is akin to hearing Elvis is coming back from the dead and opening up a karaoke dojo. It may even be better than that.

Chick-fil-A confirmed long-standing rumors it would open its first Nevada outpost within the next 18 months.

Update (1/26/17): Two Chick-fil-A locations have opened in Las Vegas. Find out details.

The first location will be in Henderson, a smaller, less interesting, version of Las Vegas. The short ride to Henderson, and the utter lack of anything else to do there, will be completely worth it.

Chick-fil-A Las Vegas

Las Vegas is about to put its collective dollar bill into the g-string of Chick-fil-A.

The Chick-fil-A restaurant in Henderson will be located at Stephanie Street and Warm Springs Road, a fact you’ll no doubt find irrelevant until the moment the location opens, then you’ll be Googling the holy hell out of “Chick-fil-A Las Vegas address,” trust us.

Chick-fil-A has more than 1,900 restaurants serving the lucky bastards in 42 states, but until now, Nevada has been ignored by Chick-fil-A like the comedian in “X Burlesque.” But no longer. The boundless gloriousness of its chicken sandwiches and waffle fries are close-at-hand.

Beyond the life-altering food, Chick-fil-A is also known for the friendliness of its staff and overall guest experience. Not the friendliness other restaurants force their employees to fake, either. The other kind. The kind that restores your faith in humanity.

Now, we know what you might be thinking. Chick-fil-A is the company once embroiled in controversy about its support of groups opposed to same-sex marriage. That’s past tense, baby.

See, the clueless brouhaha-sparker was the company’s CEO Dan Cathy. For years now, Chick-fil-A has been trying to distance itself from his misguided public statements. After an avalanche of feedback from customers and other reasonable people, Dan Cathy saw the light. He’s figured out you can hold personal beliefs, but in the end, it’s better to adhere to the separation of church and chicken.

Seriously, though. If you really want to take a stand against companies that have ever supported organizations with offensive agendas, you’re going to be giving up a lot of your favorite things. (Ever drive a Volkswagen or clothing from Hugo Boss?)

Here’s the facts: In September 2012, an organization called the Civil Rights Agenda confirmed Chick-fil-A has “ceased donating to organizations that promote discrimination, specifically against LGBT civil rights.” Chick-fil-A itself has said the company “will treat every person equally, regardless of sexual orientation.”

Chick-fil-A cows

We suggest Dan Cathy make it up to us by keeping their Las Vegas restaurants open seven days a week! Chick-fil-As are typically closed on Sundays. Don’t get us started.

Why hasn’t that news been out there as widely as the original controversy? Because there’s nothing in it for grand-standing buffoons like Mike Huckabee, and the media gives a lot more air time to boycotts and big, ugly controversies than it does making things right.

So, let’s move on and revel in the engorged anticipation so richly deserved by the news of Chick-fil-A bringing a metric ass-ton of chicken sandwich succulence to Nevada in the relatively near future.

Let us focus our attention on what’s really important: How in the hell are Chick-fil-A’s so much better than any other chicken sandwich, ever? Chick-fil-A says the sandwich is “a boneless breast of chicken seasoned to perfection, hand-breaded, pressure cooked in 100% refined peanut oil and served on a toasted, buttered bun with dill pickle chips.” The company’s secret recipe has eluded copycats and food detectives, but some say the trick is to brine the chicken in pickle juice.

Chick-fil-A Las Vegas

Get thee inside us, temptress!

Let us focus our attention, too, on Chick-fil-A’s soft serve, “Icedream,” so good it has its own Facebook fan page but can also cure that disease where your arms look like tree bark. Actual results may vary, but it’s really, really good.

There’s more news to come about Chick-fil-A’s impending conquest of Las Vegas, and we’ll make sure to keep you abreast of any developments. (Like we were going to miss out on that joke. Do you know this blog at all?)

When the first Chick-fil-A location opens, you’ll be able to find us camped outside like those whack-jobs in line outside Best Buy waiting for the latest iPhone.

Except not in a weird way. The other way. The way that restores your faith in brining.

 

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  • Rooster

    Trying to care about the owners beliefs…
    Trying to care about the owners beliefs…
    Nope…
    Not feeling it…

    • The key is to be able to ignore them while enjoying a chicken sandwich. We are really, really good at ignoring.

  • Steven Brown

    The controversial comments were from Dan Cathy, the founder’s son, who is still very much alive.

    I live deep in the heart of Chick-Fil-A Country, so having them around me isn’t a big deal. The restaurant where the first Chick-Fil-A sandwiches were sold is about 7 miles from where I live. Here in Atlanta, a handful of the Chick-Fil-A locations are branded as Dwarf Houses after the original restaurant and can be described as a combination of a diner and a regular Chick-Fil-A restaurant. One side of the restaurant has sit down service and larger menu than the regular Chick-Fil-A operation, which is the other side of the restaurant. The original Dwarf House location is open 24 hours for much of the week (They’re open from 6AM on Monday until 10PM on Saturday.), and over the years, I’ve found myself there late at night quite a few times.

    • Thanks so much for catching the gaff, Steven. You’re our hero. As we may have Tweeted. Not sure. We’re drunk. However, not too drunk to express our appreciation for your sharing your insights!

  • NHBill603

    Jesus, sell that chicken guy!
    It’s just alright.
    Too sweet, I mean in a weird way, for fried chicken if you ask me.
    The fries are nothing to talk about.
    They are very clean but they close on Sunday one of the few days of the week when I might actually eat some convenient drive-thru.
    Oh and sorry but the Jesus freaks are still throughout that joint with the gay hating dude that popped off still very much the boss.
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dan_T._Cathy

  • The rampant bigotry of the CEO is what makes it taste so good.

    Last week, I went there for the first time in a few years. The food is good, but the service is mechanically smarmy and servile. I feel like I’m being taken care of by a bunch of Stepford Wives. I honest to god prefer the disaffected broken English service at a below-average McDonalds. Every “thank you” at Chick-fil-A is immediately met with a suspiciously cheerful “My pleasure!” Hogwash. It’s not truly your pleasure, you’re working fast food. And if it really is your pleasure to get me a lemonade refill, I can only imagine that something crazy like two Polynesian Sauces and a diet Arnold Palmer will bring you close to climaxing in the middle of the restaurant. The drive-thru (which had two people stationed outdoors in June in Phoenix, what the hell Chick-fil-A?!) had a setup where the first person would get your name and then everyone else staffing the drive-thru calls you by name like you’re a regular and they’ve seen you a million times. It’s meant to be friendly in a sense of “You’re a name, not a number”, but it comes across as “You’re a name, not a person”.

    Meanwhile, if you want to get the Chick-fil-A goodness at home, someone cracked the code. http://www.seriouseats.com/2012/07/the-food-lab-how-to-make-a-chick-fil-a-sandwich-at-home.html

    • Rooster

      I mean…you know…not that you’re bitter about it, or anything like that…

    • Jill

      Listen, you seem like a well spoken guy; a quality I can certainly appreciate. However, I think you need to step off your high horse and realize that some people do actually value and take their jobs seriously, no matter their perceived (yes perceived) ranking in society. It’s a fast food joint, a convenient chicken sandwich with friendly service…kindly take your order, shove it in your face and move on with life and the bigger first world problems.

      • I’ve been in the food service industry over 20 years. I take food service incredibly seriously. I have seen a good number of Chick-fil-A employees give sincere, warm, friendly service, and that service is fabulous. But, there seems to be a corporate mandate to lay it on with a trowel, and when that happens it comes across as insincere.

  • barry

    I hope they do NOT have transgender rest rooms

    • It’s complicated. Main question: How do we convince them to stay open on Sundays?!

      • barry

        why? In Nevada you can not sell a new car on Sunday so what is the problem there?